OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
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Please post political post in the new Politics forum.
- Ysabel Kid
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OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
This is why I can't work at WalMart (this is not really me)
So after landing my new job as a Wal-Mart greeter, a good find for many retirees, I lasted less than a day...... About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, heavy, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.
As I had been instructed, I said pleasantly, 'Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?' The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, 'Hell no, they ain't twins. The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?'
So I replied, 'I'm neither blind nor stupid, Ma'am, I just couldn't believe someone slept with you twice. Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.'
My supervisor said I probably wasn't cut out for this line of work.
So after landing my new job as a Wal-Mart greeter, a good find for many retirees, I lasted less than a day...... About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, heavy, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.
As I had been instructed, I said pleasantly, 'Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?' The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, 'Hell no, they ain't twins. The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?'
So I replied, 'I'm neither blind nor stupid, Ma'am, I just couldn't believe someone slept with you twice. Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.'
My supervisor said I probably wasn't cut out for this line of work.
Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
Mike Johnson,
"Only those who will risk going too far, can possibly find out how far one can go." T.S. Eliot
"Only those who will risk going too far, can possibly find out how far one can go." T.S. Eliot
Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
There are several times a day on a typical day that I wish I could say something. I have bitten my tongue so many times that it has a groove in it that perfectly matches my teeth. That joke is too close to the truth to be funny.
D. Brian Casady
Quid Llatine Dictum Sit, Altum Viditur.
Advanced is being able to do the basics while your leg is on fire---Bill Jeans
Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up---Robert Frost
Quid Llatine Dictum Sit, Altum Viditur.
Advanced is being able to do the basics while your leg is on fire---Bill Jeans
Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up---Robert Frost
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- Advanced Levergunner
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Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
Six pack beauty queen!
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Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
I love your reply to her. Every time I go to Wallmart(which is about as little as possible) I see dozens of her clones in the store. Makes me want to rush home and take a shower to wash off the feeling. To me it is not humor, it is an unpleasant fact that these people exist.
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- Advanced Levergunner
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Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
Yes,
And they are procreating, and we are paying for it; I can NOT in my mind, no matter how hard I try; justify it!
And they are procreating, and we are paying for it; I can NOT in my mind, no matter how hard I try; justify it!
Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
That must have happened here in Plant City.
If you're gonna be stupid ya gotta be tough-
Isiah 55:8&9
It's easier to fool people than it is to convince them they have been fooled.
Isiah 55:8&9
It's easier to fool people than it is to convince them they have been fooled.
- gamekeeper
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Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
Brilliant
Whatever you do always give 100%........... unless you are donating blood.
Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
Even a Sasquatch has to get some somewhere...
Government office attracts the power-mad, yet it's people who just want to be left alone to live life on their own terms who are considered dangerous.
History teaches that it's a small window in which people can fight back before it is too dangerous to fight back.
History teaches that it's a small window in which people can fight back before it is too dangerous to fight back.
- Borregos
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Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
Pete
Sometimes I wonder if it is worthwhile gnawing through the leather straps to get up in the morning..................
Sometimes I wonder if it is worthwhile gnawing through the leather straps to get up in the morning..................
- 2ndovc
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Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
FWiedner wrote:Even a Sasquatch has to get some somewhere...
jb
jasonB " Another Dirty Yankee"
" Tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring?"
" Tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring?"
- Ysabel Kid
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Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
Some of the "women" I have seen at Wally World would make Sasquatch run away screaming like a like girl!FWiedner wrote:Even a Sasquatch has to get some somewhere...
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- Advanced Levergunner
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- Advanced Levergunner
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- Joined: Sat Dec 22, 2007 1:08 am
- Location: Arizona headed for New Mexico
Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
I see you have been to the wal-mart in Alamagordo, New Mexico.
Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
WalMart....All those tattoos and beards.......and that's just the women.
The Rotten Fruit Always Hits The Ground First
Proud Life Member Of:
NRA
Second Amendment Foundation
Citizens Committee For The Right To Keep And Bear Arms
DAV
Proud Life Member Of:
NRA
Second Amendment Foundation
Citizens Committee For The Right To Keep And Bear Arms
DAV
Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
wow, you guys are rough.
Mike Johnson,
"Only those who will risk going too far, can possibly find out how far one can go." T.S. Eliot
"Only those who will risk going too far, can possibly find out how far one can go." T.S. Eliot
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Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
Blain. So are you saying this isn't the place to cruise chicks?
Click Click Boom
Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
*shudder*Gobblerforge wrote:Blain. So are you saying this isn't the place to cruise chicks?
The Rotten Fruit Always Hits The Ground First
Proud Life Member Of:
NRA
Second Amendment Foundation
Citizens Committee For The Right To Keep And Bear Arms
DAV
Proud Life Member Of:
NRA
Second Amendment Foundation
Citizens Committee For The Right To Keep And Bear Arms
DAV
Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
I have suggested for many years there should be a test given to be able to reproduce. Similar to a drivers license, marriage license...reproductive license.
Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
"Quando Omni Flunkus Moritati"
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- Levergunner 3.0
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Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
Glad to see that doesn't just happen in my neck of the woods only........
Thanks for the laugh, Tom
Thanks for the laugh, Tom
War sees no color, sex, or ethnic background - wars only see blood shed by our heroes for our freedoms.
I Am An American! Fighting for our Country and our way of life.
Fourth Generation Veteran and Proud !!
I Am An American! Fighting for our Country and our way of life.
Fourth Generation Veteran and Proud !!
- Ysabel Kid
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Re: OT Humor - Why I can't work at Walmart
Welcome to the fire Double00!Double00 wrote:I have suggested for many years there should be a test given to be able to reproduce. Similar to a drivers license, marriage license...reproductive license.