Remember the Council directive that gardeners shouldn't lock their sheds so the thieves won't have to damage the shed breaking in? Here's the latest.
Me thinks the sun has indeed set on the British Empire...
Tom
Gardener ordered to take down barbed wire fence 'in case thieves hurt themselves on it'
A gardener has been ordered by council chiefs to remove three foot high barbed wire ringing his allotment - in case thieves scratch themselves climbing over it.
Bill Malcolm, 61, took the drastic step of installing the wire in a bid to prevent burglars raiding his tool shed and ransacking his vegetable plots.
Intruders have struck three times in four months, stealing more than £300 worth of hardware, including spades, forks and hoes as well as destroying his potato patch.
The fed-up gardener surrounded his 600 square yard site in Worcester with a single strand of barbed wire, which stood no more than waist high.
But his local council declared the security measure was a health and safety hazard and warned him they would forcibly remove it if he refused.
Bill said: 'It's an absolutely ridiculous situation, all I wanted was to protect my property but the wire had to go in case a thief scratched himself.
'The council said they were unhappy about the precautions I had made but my response was to tell them that only someone climbing over on to my allotment could possibly hurt themselves.
'They shouldn't be trespassing in the first place but the council apologised and said they didn't want to be sued by a wounded thief.
'I told them to let the thief sue me so at least that way I would know who was breaking into my allotment but everything I said fell on deaf ears. It seems as though they are so wrapped up in red tape, they are unable to help me.
Bill Malcolm
Security battle: Intruders have struck Bill's allotments three times in four months
'It was just three foot high and wasn't as though I'd dug a moat filled with piranha and erected six foot iron railings.
'A lot of people, myself included, are growing our own veg to beat the credit crunch. But what's the point if they are going to be ripped up by mindless idiots?
'I take care of this allotment, it's somewhere peaceful to come to after work, but it's very demoralising to have your belongings stolen all the time and your hard work ruined.'
Bill, has grown potatoes, onions, beetroot and asparagus on two neighbouring allotment patches for the last eight years.
Over the past 18 months, a number of other sheds have been broken into, resulting in thousands of pounds worth of tools stolen and produce destroyed.
Police are aware of five incidents this year although father-of-one Bill said two thirds of the 50 allotment holders on the site had suffered some sort of vandalism or theft.
Bromsgrove District Council admitted tenants were responsible for keeping their own plots secure but argued that the land is surrounded by post and rail fencing.
A spokeswoman said: 'With regard to the barbed wire, when this is identified on site, we are obliged to request its removal or remove it on health and safety grounds to the general public as this is a liability issue.
'This is a requirement enforced by our health and safety department.
'The allotment land in question is part of a green belt area and is surrounded by post and rail fencing which is in keeping with the nature of the site and surrounding area.
'Due to its rural location this site is vulnerable to criminal activity. Burglary is a criminal matter and we advise tenants to contact the local police.
'As part of their allotment agreement, tenants are responsible for keeping their plot secure. The Council has not received any reports of theft other than that from Mr Malcolm but we will be monitoring the situation.
'The numbers of burglaries that have occurred on this allotment do not warrant the expense of installing CCTV.'
But Sergeant Nick Husbands of West Mercia police added: 'We can confirm five thefts from Round Hill allotments have been reported in the last year.
'These have mainly been from sheds and our advice to allotment holders is not to leave anything of value there. Expensive items like strimmers should be taken home.
'Patrols have been increased and crime prevention advice has been given. We are also encouraging residents to postcode their tools, for example with SmartWater, which uses a colourless liquid containing a chemical marker similar to DNA.'
