Young guys having trouble finding life mates

[AJMD429]

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From what many of my male patients in their 20's and 30's tell me, the women in that age group have largely become shallow, high-maintenance, materialistic LIBERALS, and there's too few women in that age group to supply the young men with decent life mates.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-U4kTvB_usw

I'm thinking that church is about the only place a young guy could meet a woman of value these days.

[GunnyMack]

I can believe that along the coasts and in big cities.
I gave up after I had one try to sue for custody of MY DOG!

[gamekeeper]

The best place to meet a female of any age is in a gun shop...

[earlmck]

For us folks in the rural areas and small towns this is hard to fathom because it is different out in our world. But not surprising in the cities, where unfortunately most of the people live these days. My observation is that there must be a virus found in cities that infects the folks. Turns their brains to mush and they become democrats.

Maybe the XY chromosomes have more resistance to the virus than the XX.

[samsi]

It's been in the works for some time - decades of media gaslighting and conditioning has brought this on us. I was first taken aback upon encountering it back in the late 80's and it's far more widespread now.

I've known a few guys (3) over the last 20 years or so that had good luck with Russian brides, I'd be inclined to look that direction if I were younger and in the market.

[Scott Tschirhart]

The Bible speaks very clearly about this.

[Steve in MO]

My oldest son got very lucky. He and his wife were high school sweethearts. They've been together for nine years and married for the last two. But, I see a lot of younger guys who just don't want the drama that seems to accompany this generation of women (and many men, sadly.)

[Ray]

And we thought it was difficult to find a bride forty years ago when the criteria was, if her virtue had been indeed already compromised, at least a model with low mileage and had not been with a spade.

Today ? Is she even a woman ?

[AmBraCol]

It goes both directions. My wife and have worked in family ministry for decades now. And things are getting more difficult, especially if you're looking in the wrong places. Most marital issues start in the dating phase of the relationship, and one could argue even BEFORE the dating relationship as the character we build as children/youth has a great effect on the person we are when we start looking for a relationship. For a long time folks have been going physical first and then wondering why things don't work out in the long run.

As Scott mentions above, the Bible has a lot to say about these issues. Ephesians 5, especially. If you aren't willing to lovingly lay your life and desires down in service to her - you ain't the man you need to be. And if she does not respect you and honor you, she ain't the woman you need. Digging around in the spiritual and psychological whys and wherefores of this is fascinating. At least to those of us interested in the human creature and how/why we tick.

One thing about depending on the church as "a good place to find a wife/husband" is that the church is a hospital and not all the patients are responding to treatment. That being said, your odds of finding a good wife in a strong church are much higher than finding a good wife in the party scene. But again, it's not just "find a good wife", but also "be a good husband". I know one case where a luckyidgit did the equivalent of winning the lottery. He found an over 30, physically attractive, woman determined to be the embodiment of a Proverbs 31 wife. But as I said, he was a luckyidjit and burned that relationship to the ground. And 15 years later he's STILL making her life miserable because she gave him a son and he's trying to micromanage her life because of it. Anyway, there's good young women out there. And there's good young men out there. I'm blessed to know many young families who are raising their kids right. I pray for them, that they find their life mate and honor their Creator through their marriages.

[AJMD429]

Today ? Is she even a woman ?

Funny you should mention that.... I have a very nice patient in his 50's who got an amicable (just married too young) divorce in his 30's, and he's just now starting to want to date. He's a pretty solid Christian type guy, and hard worker, etc - should be a nice 'catch' for a woman wanting someone to live the second half of her life with.

He has met about a dozen women in the past 2 years, half of them at church events no less, and he said he learned "One question you have to ask the first time you to out to dinner together or whatever, before you decide to go out again..." I said what is that...?

He said you MUST ask (because he's gotten the WRONG answer, three out of twelve times), even though it is very embarassing...

"Have you now, or have you ever, had a penis...?"

And he's NOT blind or dumb... They are that good at 'switching' these days.

Now I am NOT a hater, or even a ridiculer, of those who are so uncomfortable being a (s)he that they decide to switch teams. They obviously must have a huge bunch of stresses and bad-life-stories happen to get there. Even if I think their 'solution' is the wrong one, they were evidently (mis)guided by someone of influence. Rarely, and it is VERY rarely, it actually does work out somehow. But all that aside - as someone in the 'dating pool', I would certainly want to know whether my new best-friend was a catfish or a dogfish.

[Griff]

Ain't any easier for older gentlemen also.

[barbarossa]

They will be better off without those women.Stay single ,do as you please and buy all the guns you want instead of having everything you worked for jerked out from under you by a selfish person who just used you as a cash cow so they can live for free

[Ysabel Kid]

Y2K is experiencing the same thing. His Mom and I keep telling him to get back to church. He's stubborn, but at least he knows not to get involved with a liberal woman.

[Safestuffer]

Isn't any better in church. The amount of women within the church who will openly pursue you while they are wearing a ring is disgusting.

We as a culture have allowed our wives, mothers, daughters, and sisters to become tools of Satan.

[BenT]

My son is 25, is in great shape goes to the gym. Ran a triathlon this summer. He is a mechanical Engineer, has a side business, lives within his means. He has his act together. He says most women he meets are too busy on their phone or are on anxiety meds. Hard to find a normal one out there. Going through college he kept his 2003 S10 running, replacing transmission and other drive train components. He kept driving it for two years after getting out of school so he could pay off is $40K of student loans. This last June after paying of his loans he bought a 2018 F350 Lariat for his business. needs. It's a nice truck. He kept his beat up S10. I asked why do you want that around. He said that is my first date truck!

My daughter doesn't have any better luck. She is 27 has her act together and she can't find a man who is interested in hiking, kayaking and just being outdoors. Most of guys she meets game or just hang out at the house. They are not mechanical or shoot guns. My daughter called me about he car pulling to the left. I told her that it is probably a sticky caliper. She got on youtube and replaced it herself. Called her friend whos boyfriend is a mechanical engineer to help bleed the brakes. He had no clue how to do it. She did because she has helped me.

Not sure where the normal ones are hiding.

[mickbr]

Easy lives, sex on tap, drug use, illicit and prescription mental medications. I worked overseas and with 2nd world white folk( say former yugoslavia) the bearing of men and women is so vastly different from us. Even in a war they are less scatterbrained and zany than the average westerner. Steady conversations, direct eye contact, women act like women. You come back to a western country and everyone seems like 'snakes' I mean physically as in their movements- your talking to your buddies and they are bobbing their heads and weaving, eyebrows jumping up and down you feel like saying" For heavens sake just stand still like a man for 3 seconds." I even point to marijuana use which about everyone has tried. I believe it permanently changes peoples minds, maybe just 0.5% and therefore society as a whole. Its why the old folk banned it across the world. When life was more set and stable, the differences of the drug user were notable. These days with all the societal mess, its just part of the noise. Sorry for the long diatribe.

[Scott Tschirhart]

There are some very good women out there. But you will have to look to find them.

There are very good men out there, but they aren’t terribly easy to find either.

We are reaping what we sowed.

[Gunstore Commando]

Three words -- community education classes.

My wife and I have been going to an herbal medicine class. There's usually about twelve people there. And it's either one other guy or just me. Other than that, women of all different ages, shapes and sizes, Some of them are kind of cute.

I've noticed the same thing in other community ed class,

[piller]

I met and married while we both were in the Army. Her Mother, a Liberal, hated me. My wife was almost disowned for joining the Army.
36, nearly 37, years later, we are still together. She has enough energy for 3 people, and after 78 TIAs and 3 major strokes from the Covid vaccine, I barely have enough energy for 1 person.

[Scott Tschirhart]

I knew my wife as a friend for five years before we decided to date. I’ve been dating her ever since.

She is the only woman I have been with who is worthy of laying my life down for. She knew me when I had nothing. She stuck with me and I have no doubt that she is absolutely devoted to me.

She makes this really easy.

[AJMD429]

I knew my wife as a friend for five years before we decided to date. I’ve been dating her ever since.

She is the only woman I have been with who is worthy of laying my life down for. She knew me when I had nothing. She stuck with me and I have no doubt that she is absolutely devoted to me.

She makes this really easy.

Same here - met at 20 & 17, and both Medicare-age now. No interest in ANY other person; we grew UP together, and our interests and skills intertwined as we grew. In my line of work I've probably seen 15,000 birthday-suited women, and they all have basically the same equipment, just different shapes and sizes, so why anyone would destroy a friendship/marriage just to experience a different playground is beyond me. I think what happens is that by letting our youth be so frivolous with their 'playground usage', they never get to the point of truly DEEP relationships, so the first time the swing gets rusty or the finances stressful or the job overwhelming, they think the answer is as simple as cut-and-run.

It is sad, because a sound marriage can be the second-greatest blessing there is (kids/grandkids is for sure the greatest, but for us old-fashioned types, those don't come until after the marriage).

I don't feel sorry for the promiscuous crowd, for they made bad choices, but I do feel sorry for the ones who TRIED to do everything right, only to have a spouse either die, or leave them. The hurt must seems like it would be unbearable.

[Ysabel Kid]

My son is 25, is in great shape goes to the gym. Ran a triathlon this summer. He is a mechanical Engineer, has a side business, lives within his means. He has his act together. He says most women he meets are too busy on their phone or are on anxiety meds. Hard to find a normal one out there. Going through college he kept his 2003 S10 running, replacing transmission and other drive train components. He kept driving it for two years after getting out of school so he could pay off is $40K of student loans. This last June after paying of his loans he bought a 2018 F350 Lariat for his business. needs. It's a nice truck. He kept his beat up S10. I asked why do you want that around. He said that is my first date truck!

My daughter doesn't have any better luck. She is 27 has her act together and she can't find a man who is interested in hiking, kayaking and just being outdoors. Most of guys she meets game or just hang out at the house. They are not mechanical or shoot guns. My daughter called me about he car pulling to the left. I told her that it is probably a sticky caliper. She got on youtube and replaced it herself. Called her friend whos boyfriend is a mechanical engineer to help bleed the brakes. He had no clue how to do it. She did because she has helped me.

Not sure where the normal ones are hiding.

Ben -

First, it is too bad your daughter is so far away. Those are the same activities Y2K enjoys!

That is actually another point. My wife and I worked very hard, and sacrificed a lot, to get our two kids through college debt-free. But most of the young women Y2K meets are loaded with college debt. It's one thing to have some debt you got while getting a degree that will get you a good job with a decent chance of repaying that debt. It's another to have 6-figure debt for a degree that has no chance of ever paying for itself. And a lot of women have just that - i.e. - any degree that ends in "Studies".

[Steve in MO]

I'm afraid we're almost at the point where a major apocalyptic event will be the only thing to make things change. Take all the comforts and technology away, and people will revert to traditional roles pretty quickly. Men and women are free to act the way they want because they have clean running water. Sorry, that's the old survivalist in me popping up.